Month: February 2019

Apathy. I often write about different emotions in this blog. Grief is so complicated and the anger, guilt, sadness, yearning, questions and confusion that come with it can make it an endless cycle of feeling. Grief can hurt so much because never have we felt so much. There can be a sense that suddenly we’ve been turned inside out, so that we’re made of nothing but nerves that can be pinched at any moment, even by the slightest trigger.

But grief is constantly changing shape, and for some grievers, at some point in their journey comes an entirely new feeling…and what’s so scary about it? That in some ways it’s not feeling at all.

The other day I spoke with a  widow who I have been grief coaching. It’s been over two years since her husband died. That means she’s been through multiple birthdays, anniversaries, Thanksgivings. And like most widows she would say…she’s gotten through them. She didn’t always know if she could but she did, and that’s the best she could do. But lately, she said, the grief feels a little worse. A little harder. She’s crying more, yearning more, feeling more frustrated, lost, and lonely.

And she just couldn’t get it. Why, after all this time and all she’s been through and all she’s been able to accomplish, why would the grief be worse now?